A Trodden Way

A week ago I was shuffling, sorting and yes, even shredding, old papers that I thought I no longer have a need for.  Some were old financial documents, others of a much more personal nature.  By personal I mean truly personal, not just personal facts.  Among these were notes or letters from friends, family and even a few acquaintances.  Re-reading the sentiments of those I consider close to me was encouraging and affirming.

It is always fulfilling to be reminded of some one’s love for us, even if that person and us are not as close as we used to be.  Or, maybe we are close but life has gotten in the way.  Different paths, different circumstances, sometimes very different responses to life’s similar circumstances.

While I was basking in the love, I came across a not so lovely group of papers. My hand impulsively moved  in the direction of that shredder!  Just as instantly, I realized I was being challenged. I paused for several seconds and realized I was questioning my own genuineness as well as the sincerity of others. 

 I was questioning Providence’s perfect power and love. Hmmm, this event seemed familiar to me.  Almost like a da ja vue, but not quite so vague like :”did this really happen?”  But more of: “I know I have done this before” and then in that pausing, like we all do in a da ja vue it came to me.  The good and the bad, sorting through life’s issues, this is what we do.  We hold on to some and let go of others.  How sad that we immediately want to hang on to the good and throw out the bad as if it never happened at all. 

I love Providence.  I suppose it’s instinctive to try to forget the bad or painful moments of our lives, but they are just as important to us in our sanctification process as the good or positive moments are.  Even the reminders of those times/people can help us to see the hand of Providence and how it has moved to our good and His glory!  This is one of the mysterious ways of God.  Instead of being fearful of this these days I am learning to embrace the mystery as an adventure.

Ah ha!  I have “been there done that”! The last time I was tempted to get rid of those reminders of painful experiences I came across this Scripture:  Ecclesiastes 7:13-14

“Consider the work of God:  For who can make straight what He has made crooked?  In the day of prosperity be joyful.  But in the day of adversity consider: Surely God has appointed the one as well as the other.”

What perfect peace comes from knowing that God is in control of the good the bad and the ugly…He is working through it all to our good and His glory for those that love Him and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28)  So the next time you’re tempted to run away from or even shred those reminders of the painful moments/persons in your life consider this “surely God has appointed the one as well as the other”.

Although this is the title to one of my favorite hymns it is also  the phrase that is stuck in my head and just won’t quit popping in and out.  Imagine one of those wheels that a gerbil runs on, when his little heart beats so fast he jumps off for about two seconds before he is compelled to jump back on until his heart needs another break!

That is how I feel when I consider that Olivia is graduated from High School and Ike is getting married in three weeks!  I keep asking myself: And can it be?  This has been a whirlwind three months with one event leading up to the next big event.  Olivia is graduated from high school and has expressed her desire to be “done” with school.  This is more than fine for me and for Charles, but it has put a burden on our hearts to be sure that she is transitioning into the “real world” and that she can be excited to be a participant of it.  She has begun art classes at Studio 308 downtown and we are amazed at her artistic ability.  She loves it and we notice that she comes away very content with her work and herself.  Our hope is that she will participate in music classes as well and be able to secure a part time job come mid August with a nearby preschool/kindergarten class.

Isaac: what is amazing here, is the one child who despised change the most has under gone the most change in the last six months.  He has moved to St. Augustine in order to secure an apartment for he and Lauren once they are married.  It took two months longer to find a job than he had anticipated, but the provision came and he and Lauren are grateful to God for that.  He is doing what I think he does best and that is “mapping things out”.  It must come from his inner desire for things to stay the same….planning helps to ease him into things!  So on the map, he and Lauren will be married in three weeks!  Wow!  After the wedding comes moving Lauren to St. Augustine and helping her to register for her Fall classes at Flagler.  Isaac very much wants to complete his AA before heading off into the Army next Spring, but he will need to do some intense “mapping” over the next month and a half for that to continue to be in his sights.

I love the way that God providentially allows the paths of people to cross  and it always seems to be at just the right time.  This is how we here in the Bennett home see  Lauren Renee Brown.  She is everything a mom could wish for in a daughter in law (to be).  She loves the Lord and sees the world through His eyes and is always willing to adjust her heart to His will.  She has made Isaac’s eyes light up in a way that this mom has not seen for nearly 10 years.  Ike and Lauren truly compliment one another through and through and we look forward to watching them grow in their relationships with the Lord through their marriage.

There is so much more going on in our kids lives right now, but for the moment I just wanted to post about these two recent happenings which have brought us immeasurable joy!

   The phone rang in the middle of a counseling session last week and Charles picked it up in his office, so as not to have it continue ringing and disturb me.  A few minutes later as the client and I continued on I could hear the buzzing of my cell phone which was in my purse several feet away. As it was doing its thing I thought to myself that it might be Olivia’s school calling.  For some reason, when the school calls to leave an automated message, it will call the home phone first and then my cell phone second leaving of course the same message.

As the client and I were finishing our session and saying goodbye, Charles came in from his office through the back door and announced that Olivia was ill and needed to be picked up from school.  He wasn’t sure if I needed more time thus requiring him to do so or not. 

So off to the school I went to gather up Miss Olivia and thinking, in the car, how I had not seen her since the day before when she was picked up by her dad for their usual Wednedsay afternoon and evening rendevous.  It occured to me that this was about the time I start missing my Livvy every Thursday. I start anticpating seeing her sweet smile as she disembarks from the bus and Molly’s rambuncious greeting as she bounds down the steps and sidewalk to meet her half way.  All this made me smile and actually tear up.  We have come such along way with Olivia and the thought of her not well or ill made my heart swell with gratitude for how far God has brought her. 

At home an hour or so later Charles again came in from the office to check and see how we were doing.  I declared, “Well Livvy is not a very happy camper today.”  To which she replied, “That’s because that shirt is at my dad’s and wasn’t clean, so I couldn’t wear it today.” 

To which Charles and I just looked at each other and smiled and said “We’re so glad you’re home Livvy!” (giggles)